What’s more frustrating than speaking without being heard? We’ve all been there: confiding in a friend as she paws at her phone; pitching an idea to a co-worker as he interrupts with his own; telling your mom about your day as her eyes glaze over — apparently focusing on something else much, much more interesting than you.These situations, in the moment, can be annoying and downright hurtful. But the fact that they happen often can’t be too surprising. “There’s a misconception that when we hear, we listen,” says Pamela Cooper, vice president of the International Listening Association, “but listening is really hard work, and it takes a great deal of concentration.” No wonder our friends and family and co-workers can be lousy at it. But what about you — are you a good listener?